


Mcyt Angst Oneshots

by shinitai_san



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Blood and Gore, Depression, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Intoxication, Overdose, Paranoia, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Trauma, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-16 22:48:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28589793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinitai_san/pseuds/shinitai_san
Summary: !!!READ TAGS FOR TRIGGER WARNING!!!Check the first chapter if you want to request. My requests are: OPENThese are mostly me venting and projecting. If any of the content creators (cc's) will say they are uncomfortable with these types of fics I'll take their chapter down and remove them from this book.Please, don't hate. If you don't like this just don't read and move on with your day. Thanks :)
Relationships: Floris | Fundy & Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Floris | Fundy & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Jschlatt & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Jschlatt & Wilbur Soot, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 13
Kudos: 79





	1. Request Page

REQUESTS ARE: OPEN

What I won't write:  
Smut  
Romantic relationships (unless the cc's are fine with shipping)  
Pedophilia 

What I will write:  
SBI family dynamic  
Anything sad  
Lightly graphic scenes (for ex. blood)  
dsmp based oneshots (Altho not often I prefer IRL)

Preferred CC's to write:  
Philza  
Wilbur Soot  
Jschlatt  
Tubbo  
Technoblade  
TommyInnit  
Ranboo  
Eret  
Fundy  
MegaPvP

CC's I can write:  
Karl Jacobs  
Dream  
GeorgeNotFound  
Sapnap  
Purpled  
Spifey  
TapL  
Lunch club members   
Quackity  
Antfrost

CC's I won't write:  
a6d  
Skeppy  
BadBoyHalo  
Mr. Beast  
Carson  
Punz  
Ponk

If I missed anything just ask. Thanks.   
Also if you request be specific, it makes the stuff I write easier.


	2. Techno & Wilbur soot, Family AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno is suicidal, Wilbur is there for him.  
> CW: Suicide attempt, Self-harm mention, suicide notes, Hurt/Comfort  
> Requested by: :)

It was dark, like always. Techno looked at his clock on his bedside table, _3:10 am,_ it read as it flashed a soft red light upon the black and empty room. Was it time already? He had planned to do this for some while now. 

He didn't care to be completely honest, it was now or never. And never just didn’t satisfy him enough so he went with the first option. He got his heavy body out of the cold bed he has been laying in for so long now, feeling as if his soul left him and stayed in the warm bed. His bare feet touched the hard, wooden floor, and as he carried himself across it, it left small but quite creaks. 

His gaze fell upon his dark grey jacket, thinking, until reaching into the right-side pocket, getting out a folded and crusty piece of paper, covered in tears of his own. It was a goodbye and an apology. He has written many of those but this one was his best take yet. It read:

_‘Hello everyone,_

_As you are reading this I’m probably dead. I want to say sorry and that I love you very much and I want all of you to remember that, even though I never really showed it enough to you._

_Dad, thank you for taking me and Wilbur in as small children, and I’m glad I grew up beside you. You have been the best father and the best man I have ever met (and when I say that, I seriously mean it). You gave many kids, a hope in life and a place to call home. With food, clean clothes, a warm bed and a loving family. Again thank you. Please take care of my brothers while I’m gone. They won’t understand at first but all of you will get it in time._

_Wilbur, thank you for sticking with me my whole life, both through the thick and thin. From the moment our mum kicked us out till this very moment. I want all of my belongings to go to you because I know they will stay safe in your hands. And I’m sorry for being such a bad brother. You deserve the world and I want you to move on from me and continue with your life happily, even if you won’t remember me. This is my choice, not yours, and it will never ever be your fault for this, and I mean that with my whole heart._

_Tommy & Tubbo, thank you for making my days happier and better. Whether it was because of playing games with you two or just enjoying a quiet night watching a movie. I don’t regret ever meeting you, you two are the best younger brothers on planet earth and I want you to remember that clearly. Please don’t be sad when I leave because as sad as it sounds, everyone will have to leave one day, even both of you, I just happened to not be strong enough to carry on any longer. Stay happy and bright, stick to each other and don’t do the same mistakes I did. _ _  
_ _  
_ _Again, please, stay safe and take care of yourself. I’m sorry._

_-Technoblade David Watson’_

Techno unfolded, straightened and then placed the paper on the desk under his phone. He went back to the jacket and wrapped it around himself, carefully slipping it on his bandaged and scarred arms in a way he wouldn’t cause his wounds to reopen. 

He put on a beanie that came along with it, and he also put on his favourite worn-out shoes and slowly, but quietly, made his way out of the house that was occupied by his currently sleeping family, who was unaware of what he was about to do.

As the pinkette got outside, he stumbled away from his house, dragging himself through the white snow that he had fond memories of. He remembered playing in it with his twin brother, Wilbur. The two were very close ever since babies. But contrary to popular belief, Wilbur was older by two full minutes. He was probably going to miss Wilbur the most out of anyone.

Whilst deep in thought his legs carried him to a bridge that ran above cold water which was surprisingly still flowing and not frozen from the freezing temperature. Tubbo would always play with Tommy under that bridge. Folding paper boats and racing as to who would make it the furthest until one of them sunk. They would always annoy everyone to come and play with them, but nobody really wanted to because the two of them were pros at the game.

_Don’t think about them Techno, they will move on. You know it._

A voice in his head said that to him and he knew it was right. He shrugged off his jacket and shoes and stepped over the railing, his body shivering. He looked down at the water below him, thinking about how it’ll feel once he jumps. Will it feel relieving or will he regret it? 

No, of course, he won’t regret it. He was done with life, and this was his ticket out of it.

_Guess this is it._

But as he was about to push himself off, warm and strong arms pulled him back. The person was screaming his name like crazy, sobbing… He recognized the voice.

_“W-Wilbur…?”_

“Techno what the actual _fuck_ man?! I was so scared I would come too late.” 

The brunette exclaimed, still sobbing. Techno stepped over the railing to the other side where his twin was standing.

“Oh, holy shit I’m so glad you’re ok…” 

He wrapped him in a tight and safe embrace, which the taller returned. Techno at this point also started sobbing, holding onto his brother as if his life depended on it.  
  
“C’mon Tech, get dressed again, we are going home,” 

Wilbur said. Techno did as he said, putting on his shoes and jacket once again. Without saying a word he reached for his brother’s hand. Letting him take him _home._  
  
As they were walking Wilbur decided to speak up.

“So, how long has this been going on? Of course, you don’t have to answer.”

Techno thought and then answered   
“About 1 or 2 years now. At first, I just cut myself but it slowly went downhill. It took a lot of courage to come here if I’m being completely honest. I never felt the need to reach out.”  
  
“F-Fuck dude, you should have told me! You know I’m here for you and always will be. And you self-harm? I should have figured that out, it was weird that you always wore long-sleeved shirts!  
  
“I’m sorry Will…”  
Fuck, Techno felt like he was going to cry again.  
But then Wilbur wrapped his arms around Techno once again. 

“Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. I’m just glad you’re alive and safe.”  
  
Techno smiled, and both of them continued walking home through the frozen land, beneath the shining stars of the cold winter night. They were still holding hands, never letting go. Once they made it home both of them undressed. Setting their boots down and hanging their coats. They walked upstairs to their rooms.  
  
“We can talk about all of this in the morning with dad ok? If you need anything don’t be afraid to just knock on my door.” The older said.  
  
“Of course. Good night Wilbur, I love you.” 

“Good night. I love you too.”  
  
With that, both of them parted into their rooms. And for once,

 ** _Techno felt loved._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_****_  
_** _Word count: 1264_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ello thank you for reading this! Constructive Criticism and comments are always appreciated :)


	3. Tubbo & Tommy - Abusive AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tubbo has an abusive mother, but he assumes that the abuse is just normal because she’s just ‘trying to raise him well.’ Lani and Teagan (Tubbo’s sisters) don’t exist and his father is barely ever home.  
> Also, Tommy lives just like an hour car/train ride away.
> 
> CW: Child Abuse, Mild gore, Alcohol mention, skipping meals, hurt/comfort
> 
> Guide:  
> Underlined bold text = Tubbo  
> Italics bold text = Tommy
> 
> This is strictly platonic. Tubbo and Tommy have both stated they don’t like being shipped so I won’t do that here.
> 
> Requested by: stormyfairy

It was a normal day for Tubbo, 

He woke up and at 8 am sharp, he quickly started dressing but then he remembered. _His parents are not at home._

A wave of relief washed over him, meaning that he didn’t have to wear those tacky shoes that made no sound when he was walking down the stairs.

He also didn’t have to shuffle around quietly while getting food. It felt nice. But as he wanted to go down for some breakfast he remembered his mother’s words.

_“Stop eating so much you fat pig! It’s my food and I paid for it, I only said you could have a piece for fucks sake!”_

He flinched at the memory. He still has a nasty bruise on his arm for what he did.

He suddenly wasn’t hungry and instead went to brush his teeth and get on the computer. He saw a message from none other than TommyInnit, so he decided to check it out.

**_Hey big T! I was wondering if I could visit u! I saw some cheap train tickets and it's been a while since weve seen each other. What do u think?_ **

Tubbo thought about it, he did miss Tommy a lot and wanted to see him, but on the other side, he didn’t want him to get worried because of his mother’s strict punishment she did on him before she left the house.

_‘Ah, fuck it. It’s probably nothing, my mums just keeping me in line I’m sure that he will understand.’_

And so Tubbo replied with the following.

**“Ye of corse my dude! I rlly miss u. My mum is gone for a bisness trip or whateverz so I’m home elone.”**

**_Great! The train leaves at 12:30 so I’ll be there at like 13:30 B) also please pick me up at the station or I’ll get lost in your seagull ridden shithole_ **

**Will do :D see u at 13:30! Text me the pletform when u know it!!!**

Needless to say, both of them were excited. It was 9:08 right now so Tubbo had enough time to clean the house. 

He went downstairs and started cleaning up, throwing away any glass shards, whiled away any alcohol or blood. He even wiped all of the counters just in case.

When he finished it was 11:23. Now all he had to do was patch himself up. He ran up into his room, still quietly shuffling across the wooden because of his habit.

When he got to his room he reached under his bed and got out a box filled with medical supplies. He went and bandaged his arms and legs, and also took two plasters for his almost broken nose and a cut on his left cheek.

Once he was done he put the box back, putting on a baggy sweater. It was almost winter so the sweater provided him with comfort and pleasant warmth.

He set everything up and worked on his newest YouTube video. And before he knew it, it was 13:15 and Tommy was messaging him once again.

**_Pick me up on platform 4 you ass. If you arent there I swear im gonna start stabbin’ shit >:(_ **

Tubbo chuckled at that. He got his shoes, beanie, keys, and phone and started heading to the station. It was about 15 minutes away from his house and the weather was quite pleasant.

When he arrived at the station he went straight to platform 4. He waited only about a minute or two and the train soon came rushing in. And as it stopped, a big crowd of people came rushing out.

The crowd was dense and he couldn’t seem to find his blonde friend. But all of a sudden he felt a big hand grab his shoulder.

He flinched and turned around, almost screaming for the stranger to let them go, scared that they are going to hurt him like his mother. But then he realized that it wasn’t a stranger.

“Hey, Tubbo! You look shaken up you alright? You kinda freaked out when I grabbed ya, buddy.”

“Oh sorry, my bad! There are a lot of people so I got a bit scared. Anyways let’s go home, I’m freezing!”

Tommy just nodded his head and smiled. They both started going towards the brunette’s house, casually chit chat about anything and everything.

They made it to the house, Tubbo took out his keys and they took their coats and shoes off and went into the living room.

They both sat on the couch, continuing their talking. Once their rambling came to a stop, the taller all of a sudden swooped his friend in a bone-crushing hug.

However, to Tommy’s surprise, Tubbo almost screamed out in pain and pushed his friend off. Tommy then realized that Tubbo was not only crying but… begging?

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry Tubbo! Are you all alright? Did I hurt you?!”

Tommy asked, still in a slight panic. But Tubbo continued his quiet cry, muttering something gently under his breath.

“I’m sorry buddy but if you wanna say something I’m afraid you’re gonna have to speak up a bit…”

He asked gently, but this time his short friend said something.

“I-I’m sorry f-for pushing y-y-you… P-Please don't h-hit me I’ll n-never do it again I p-promise…!”

Tommy was shocked, to say the least. Why was his best friend all of a sudden begging him to not hit him? What was he scared of?

“A-Alright listen. I’m not gonna hurt you and I never will, ok? You’re safe with me.”

Tubbo raised his head, locking his eyes with Tommy’s once. The blonde saw only confusion in his eyes along with another emotion, but before he could decipher it, Tubbo hugged him.

“Shhh, there we go… You’re with me now. Do you want me to call Wilbur and Phil? I think we should talk about this.”

Tommy said to his friend very gently. Tubbo only nodded, and Tommy took that as a sign for him to take him to his room and computer.

He lifted Tubbo. Only to realize how light the small male is. Yes, he knew Tubbo was scrawny but to this point? He was honestly more concerned.

_‘Was he skipping meals? Was his mother not feeding him? Do they have enough money for food?’_

All of these questions raced through Tommy’s head as he made his way to Tubbo’s room. Once they arrived they went inside. Tommy setting the frail body of his friend down on a chair.

He started the computer and as soon as it was up, he straight away went to discord and called up Wil and Phil in their group.

After a while of waiting both of the adults arrived. Both of them were surprised to hear Tommy instead of Tubbo.

Tommy explained the situation. And as soon as the two heard, they started interrogating Tubbo, and Tubbo answered truthfully.

He told them everything. How his mother was beating him after dad started leaving more. How he had to take care of everything, even going into his own money to pay the bills.

He told them about how he couldn’t eat much, because his mother always ate everything, not sparing him enough food. 

He even offered to show them all the bruises he has. They accepted, all of them scared of what was to come.

Tubbo turned on the camera, as he took off his sweater revealing his neck and arms which were littered with scratches, scars, bruises, and even burns from what looked like cigarettes?

All of them started crying at this point. Wilbur was angry he couldn’t be there for him. Tommy was sad that he didn’t see it sooner and Phil was honestly confused at how someone can do this to their child.

“You know what dude? Runaway from home to me! My family will understand and we can give you so much but just, please… Don’t stay here, it’s not safe.”

Tommy almost screamed out that to his friend, tears still streaming down his face. And Tubbo? He was shocked, but at the same time, he was happy.

He didn’t even hesitate and accepted his best friend's offer. The two adults were happy to hear that and left the boys to pack up, reminding them to text or call them when they got back to Tommy’s.

And so they started packing. First was the clothes, then stuff like his wallet, phone, toothbrush, and other personal items. All of that fit into one bag. It’s not like Tubbo had many things since all of the money went to alcohol for his mother.

Next was his setup and other electronics. All of those fit into another bag that was honestly much heavier than the other one.

Tommy grabbed the larger bag with electronics and Tubbo took the lighter one. They both dressed and left towards the train station once again.

On the way there Tommy explained the situation to his mother, who was also shocked but welcomed the boy to stay as long as he wanted. Even offering stuff like adoption.

They arrived at the train station, both with cried out eyes and big smiles, they went to buy their tickets. They were lucky, the train was leaving in less than ten minutes.

Once they paid they went onto the platform and waited for the train. Both of them sitting down with the heavy bags on a bench.

“Thank you so much, Tommy… I don’t know what I would do without you.”

Tubbo all of a sudden spoke up, his eyes filling with both sad and happy tears at the same time. Tommy just gently hugged his friend, muttering sweet and comforting things to him.

The train arrived shortly after. They went inside and sat down in an empty cabin that strangely reminded Tubbo of Harry Potter. 

Tubbo sat down on the soft cushions by the window, Tommy sat right next to him, holding the smaller hand for comfort. And for once

**_Tubbo felt free._ **

Word count: 1676

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi tysm for reading this! I’m so sorry for not updating lately, I got sick but I’m feeling better now :)  
> I’ll try and update at least once a week lol  
> I’m pretty proud of this one! Constructive criticism and comments are very much appreciated! ^•^


	4. Ranboo heavy angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> //TW: Death, overdose-pills, underage smoking, self harm, relapsing, suicide attempt, dysphoria, child abuse/neglect, betrayal(???), hurt no comfort/bad ending  
> -  
> Ranboo is trans/enby and uses they/he pronouns. This is an irl AU  
> -  
> Requested by: me; this is a personal vent fic; I’m just projecting lol

Things weren’t always easy for Ranboo.

They always knew they weren’t the gender he was born with. A girl.  Normally he would deal with the intense dysphoria alright. 

They purchased fidget cubes to distract themselves and especially their hands to restrict them from harming their skin. But this time things were different. 

What started as an ordinary week of online school ended horribly. His mother was in debt to a co-worker, and so the coworker redeemed their favour in the form of babysitting. 

He was pretty sure he'd handle it fine. They took care of their younger brother all the time and taking care of another child about the same age wouldn't be so. A big problem right?

Well yes, it was harder than he expected but nothing too drastic. The coworker's child was a lovely girl with a giant heart. So his brother and she got along great and while they were not a handful it was alright.

That was Monday. And as night came they checked the school websites for any updates. 

You see their geographic teacher, who was also the principal whom Ranboo was very close with and every kid had respect for, has been sick and couldn't teach. Their substitute teacher told them to check the websites for updates every Monday night since the only geography lesson was on Tuesday.

They went to the page and the first thing he saw on the main page was an announcement called “Important”. 

Thinking it was about the man they were so fond of they excitedly clicked the announcement open.

While they were right, the announcement was regarding everyone's favourite principal and also teacher, it wasn't what they were expecting.

_ ‘With a heavy heart, I'm sad I have to announce that everyone's beloved teacher and principal, Mr Paris has passed away. -Mrs. White, the vice-principal’ _

He couldn't believe it. He… He was gone. This was Ranboos first time losing someone close to them, and it was scary. Not only that he was already depressed from everything that happened to him in life, but he also looked up to Mr Paris a lot. Almost as a father figure 

_ Their dad _

Not many knew this, not even Tommy and Tubbo who they were close with knew this, but their father used to neglect them severely before and even after their parents divorced. 

Memories of their father coming home drunk and not giving a single fuck they had a high fever came rushing back. If the neighbour wouldn’t hear their cries they would already be dead…

They started sobbing. He quickly messaged a discord server of his close friends from school, asking if they already heard the news. They have. They decided to hop in a VC and Ranboo cried to them. 

They trusted their classmates. Most of them knew about everything he was going through and were always supportive. He also texted Tommy and Tubbo that he wouldn’t be streaming because of personal reasons.

The days went by slowly. Ranboo wanted to pay their respects but decided to rather not to. Not only were they not strong enough to go there, but they were also busy doing something else.

Self-harming…

He promised not to slip again. To never relapse but here he was. He felt horrible. He let everyone down but even though times were tough he knew he had his classmates who would always support him…  _ right?  _

Fast forward to Thursday. He and his classmates got into a messy fight. Something about streaming, online friends and school. But I’m going to spare you the details.

They started crying once again. This was normal but the difference was that this time they started ringing the group that had both Tommy and Tubbo in it. Tommy messaged that he would join later, that he was in class and Tubbo picked up.

“Hello?” Said Tubbo, only to hear unglued cries and sobs from his talk friends. Both of the boys knew what was happening in Ran’s life at the moment. They even knew some of the classmates.

Ranboo calmed down and told the brunette everything. How he missed his principal and his father, who he hated but still missed dearly. They told Tubbo about the argument, how their classmates made an insensitive joke that upset them and how they told them to ‘grow up’ when asked to stop. 

He told him about babysitting 2 kids and how the dysphoria of being constantly misgendered. And even told him about his stupid crush that he has had on one of his classmates for 2 years.

Tubbo was surprised but comforted him. He was curious as to what happened and why Ranboo’s classmates said what they did. So he texted them asking what was all of this about. They responded that they don’t care and only one girl, Ran’s Crush, actually apologized.

Ranboo felt alone. Betrayed even. He cared for his classmates dearly, but from what he saw and Tubbo told him they didn’t feel the same way. 

They only used him, used him for homework and abused his emotions. They didn’t care about him as a person. He was just a thing to them. As if he didn’t have feelings. 

And when they realized he  _ does _ have feelings they chose to not even apologize which meant they didn’t care about him. 

The craving for self-harm came back along with another feeling this time though. Cigarettes. Ranboo gave up smoking a long time ago, promising themselves they will never touch the cancer sticks again. But they honestly didn’t care. 

They told their mom they would go into the city tomorrow and then went to sleep. Their mom might have been very ignorant at times but she still cared about her child.

It was Friday and school was off. Their mother was at school and both of the kids were at a different house so Ranboo finally could take a rest.

They went into the kitchen and grabbed some supplies.  _ A lighter. Mom’s cigarettes. Candles. Expired pain killers. _

Was he about to do this? Yes… 

He took the local bus to the school and sat by the small memorial that kids set up for Mr Paris.

No one was around. Perfect. He grabbed his phone and sent some last messages. And even did a small video that he posted on both YouTube and Twitter saying goodbye. He turned off his phone.

They lit the candles and placed them beside the memorial. Then opened the bottle and chugged down all remaining pills from there. 

They sat down next to the memorial, leaning on a nearby wall, and lit up their last and final cigarette. And as he smoked, snow started falling. It was beautiful. And as he finished the cig, he cried and fell asleep.

And right before falling asleep, they spoke their last words.

**_I’m sorry…_ **

**_..._ **

**??? POV**

My phone pinged. Oh, who is texting me? I saw an icon pop up. It was from a person from our school… Ranboo. Most of our classmates made fun of him for being a freak but I’ve honestly always had a crush on them… 

Anyway, what did he text? I was curious and quickly opened the messenger app.

**_RannyBoo 🤍🖤_ **

-

**_Dear Nela,_ **

**_I never had the guts to tell you, but I love you. It took me a while to realize it, as instead, I would distract myself with silly little crushes. But I’ve finally admitted it to myself a few months ago. Maybe it was because every time I see you, my heart flutters, and whenever you talk to me it makes me feel like I’m floating._ **

**_I love your scent. You smell like Caramel, strawberries, and scented candles, I still can’t figure out why but whenever I hug you I can smell your scent and it sends millions of butterflies to my stomach. I get jealous when I see you care and ‘love’ someone more than me. It hurts me so much because I want you to hold me in your arms and cuddle with me like there’s no tomorrow._ **

**_Y’know... Actually, for a while, I thought that maybe we could go on a date. That maybe you had some sort of feelings for me deep inside..... But of course, how naïve to think that anyone will ever love me the same way I love them._ **

**_It tore my heart when you said that you might have a boyfriend, a boy, who I introduced you to. That moment I lost all faith I had and to say the least it hurt me... I hate unrequited love. It hurts so much._ **

**_Do you understand how many sleepless nights I’ve had, just because I spent them balling my eyes out about you? Many. But no matter what I do, how I act, how much time I spent talking to you I don’t feel good enough! And you know what? I wish I were Heather. I know it’s cheesy to bring up the song but that’s just how I feel! I’m not even HALF as pretty. I mean will I ever be enough for you? You’re perfect! I love you so much it’s tearing me apart._ **

**_Do you even wanna be friends? I feel like you don’t wanna talk to me, that you don’t like me. That I’m just a nuisance and a burden to you. Do you know how hard it is dealing with all of this? Dealing with this bullshit and also other things? Our principal died this week, I’ve been taking care of 2 kids and on top of that, I miss my abusive father. And then an argument happens, and I feel like my suspicions of you hanging out with me out of pity are true! I just can’t handle it anymore... I’m sorry._ **

**_I planned on telling you I love you on Valentine’s Day because you split up with the boy you had an interest in. I would take you to the café, I would hold your hand in the cold night and if you’d want to I would kiss you, and I would bury my hand in your hair in the hope to make you feel warm, loved, and safe. Something nobody has ever done to me._ **

**_But now I’m having second thoughts. And I’m sorry that I never told you earlier or dared to speak up. I’m a coward with self-hatred. But I’ll leave you for good now. I’ll never bother you again and I’ll never make more overblown arguments about nothing that just ends up hurting you._ **

**_Goodbye._ **

Was he joking?! Oh god please tell me this is a prank. I know his past of suicidal thoughts and stuff but to this point?

And they love me…..

NO! This is not the right time. I quickly checked his Twitter to see if he was active there. There was a video attached and I didn’t even need to play it. I could recognize it was the backyard of our school. By the memorial.

I quickly got clothed and ran as fast as I could. Thank god I lived close to the school. I ran through the snow. There they were. The white and gentle snow falling on their hazel hair and a black beanie. I quickly grabbed him and checked if he was still awake. 

No. He had closed eyes and wasn’t breathing.

I checked his pulse, putting my fingers to his cold neck to locate any sort of sign he was alive.

But nothing was there.

**_He was already gone…_ **

_ Word count: 1920 _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I’m sorry I’ve been gone so long.  
> This is what actually happened this week. I got into an argument, I’m enby and I miss my abusive father (how lovely). And my principal died. (memento Mori - you’ll be missed) also I’m craving cigs but I SHALL REFUSE  
> Everything past Thursday is made up btw-
> 
> Anyways kudos and comments are very appreciated! They are what make me keep going ^_^


End file.
